Oct
17

I’m Moving to Mexico

Immigration in the U.S. — especially illegal immigration — is the subject of many socio-cultural concerns and legal issues today. As of a couple years ago, the number of immigrants both legal and illegal in the United States hit a new record of 40 million. According to Newsmax,

Map of the United States of Mexico

“[T]he number of immigrants plus their children born in this country now stands at around 50 million, accounting for about one-sixth of the U.S. population, according to Steven A. Camarota, director of research for the Center for Immigration Studies. His report — “Immigrants in the United States, 2010: A Profile of America’s Foreign-Born Population” — is based on U.S. Census Bureau data from 2010 and 2011. “One of the most important findings is that immigration has dramatically increased the size of the nation’s low-income population,” Camarota writes, adding that even immigrants who have been in the country for 20 years are much more likely to live in poverty, lack health insurance, and take advantage of welfare benefits than are native-born Americans.”

So, I was thinkin’, maybe we could alleviate the situation by encouraging legitimate, American citizens to emigrate to Mexico and other countries. With that in mind, I reproduce below for you a letter to the editor of The Ponte Vedra Leader by Ms. Marva Turner of Jacksonville Beach, FL:

“Dear Mr. President Obama —

I am planning to move my family and extended family to Mexico, and I ask for your kind assistance. We are planning to simply sneak across the border to avoid a long wait and all the legal hassle like visas, passports, immigration quotas and laws, etc. I’m sure they handle those things the same way you do. So would you mind telling Mexico’s president that we are on our way over? Please let him know that we will be expecting the following:

1. Free medical care for my entire family.

2. Free food stamps and rent subsidies.

3. Free or subsidized college or university education.

4. Free breakfast and lunch for my kids at school.

5. Mexican schools to teach American culture and history, and display the American flag.

6. My kids and grandkids to be taught English by bilingual teachers.

7. All Mexican government forms in English.

8. English-speaking government bureaucrats for all services I might need.

9. Easily-acquired local Mexican driver license for access to free government services.

10. No consequences if I’m caught drunk or driving without a driver license or car insurance.

11. No law enforcement officer ever questioning my “legal” resident status.

12. If I commit a crime, all Mexican pro-illegal immigration organizations rush to my defense.

13. When looking for work, I’ll be the preferred choice over the local Mexican unemployed.

14. Income tax credits, so although I may not pay Mexican taxes, I receive tax refunds.

15. Participation in the Mexican Social Security program without contributing to it.

16. Participation in the program that pays me $4,500 to help me buy a new car.

17. No ID requirement to vote in Mexico.

18. Any children born in Mexico to be automatic Mexican citizens.

19. All other benefits extended to illegal foreigners allowed into the country.

20. Please make sure that the Mexican people will be nice and understanding regarding the strain we will place on their economy, and that those critical of our benefits they will be funding are called haters, bigots and racists!

I know the U.S. already does all these things for all the people who are allowed and encouraged to illegally enter the U.S. from Mexico and other countries. I am sure that Mexico’s president won’t mind returning the favor if you ask him.

Thank you for your kind assistance.”